What Will I Do All Day? (And Other Retirement Fears No One Talks About)
This is the second in a short series about what I’m learning as I approach my June 30 retirement.
I used to think retirement would feel like endless Saturday mornings with lots and lots of “Elaine Time.”
I coined the phrase Elaine Time a few years ago when I realized how much I craved a sliver of the morning to myself before diving into the demands of work. I’d wake up early—sometimes before 6am—just to carve out space for the things that made me feel like me: reading, meditating, journaling, working on a novel.
But here’s the thing: in retirement, I figure it’ll take maybe three hours (four if I really stretch it out) to enjoy Elaine Time.
So then what?
What in the world am I going to do after Elaine Time—at 11am, 1pm, 4pm—day after day?
That’s what scares me.
Turns out, my transition into retirement is more complicated than I imagined.
The Empty Calendar Moment
Like many professional women, I’ve spent decades in motion—leading, producing, caregiving, mentoring, fixing. My identity has been tightly woven into a full calendar and a full plate. I knew my role. I had a rhythm.
But last week, I realized I will soon be removing all the recurring meetings on my calendar. Once those go? My calendar will be… empty.
At first, that sounds like freedom.
But then I started wondering:
What will I do with all that free time?
Will I feel lonely in the absence of seeing my co-workers?
How do I create structure without slipping into rigidity?
And most of all—how do I shape a life that still feels purposeful?
It’s like being handed a blank canvas… and realizing you’re not entirely sure what you want to paint.
The Farmer’s Market Moment (and Yes, I Overshared)
Last weekend at the farmer’s market, my husband and I were shopping for seedlings when I struck up a conversation with a farmer selling cucumber plants. In classic Elaine fashion, I completely overshared and told him I was retiring soon and had always fantasized about working on a farm—but didn’t think I could do it because of my bad back.
He paused, smiled, and said, “You know, you could still volunteer. We always need help cleaning seeds. That wouldn’t bother your back.”
Then he invited me to come out on a volunteer day.
I have zero idea what “cleaning seeds” means, but I’m 100% in.
That small moment stuck with me—not just because he was kind, but because it reminded me:
✨ You don’t have to live the whole dream to feel the heart of it. A single day can be enough.
✨ And I really like the part of myself that’s still willing to put herself out there and try something new.
My Unofficial Retirement Plan
For the past two years, I’ve kept a running note on my phone called “Elaine’s Retirement.” It’s not a traditional plan—it’s more like a vision board in list form.
I’ve divided it into categories:
Spiritual. Creative. Physical. Learning. Travel. Volunteering. Nature. Home. Social. Bucket List.
Some entries are bold:
Walk the Camino de Santiago
Finish the novel I’m writing about a woman seeking reinvention
Host a women’s retreat
Others are small and sweet:
Make jam
Be a NICU cuddler
Create a little free library for my neighborhood
And some reflect my values:
Volunteer with immigrant families
Read to children in low-income schools
Learn more about astronomy and world history
This is my kind of retirement planning—and it turns out, there’s real science behind it.
A Canadian study found that people who plan the life side of retirement—not just the finances—report greater satisfaction in retirement.
So if you're making a list like this—or even just thinking about it—you’re already taking powerful steps.
Try This: What Comes After Your Me Time?
You don’t need a five-year plan.
But you can start exploring what might fill your days with joy and purpose.
Here’s a simple starting point:
Name 3–5 things you truly enjoy when you have uninterrupted “me time.”
Imagine: What would a full day built around that energy look like? What else would you want to try, give, learn, or savor?
Start a “Life List.”
Create a few categories like Creativity, Connection, Nature, Movement, Learning, Travel, Service, or Just-for-Fun.
Add anything that lights you up—even if it feels impractical or silly.
Let this list evolve. It’s not a bucket list. It’s a compass.
Want Help Clarifying What Comes Next?
I created a free Retirement Vision Starter Kit to guide you through this process.
Inside, you’ll find prompts to help you:
Clarify how you want to feel in this next chapter
Identify what you want more of—and what you're ready to leave behind
Explore which areas of your life might need fresh attention or structure
I believe strongly that retirement isn’t the end of your story.
It’s the start of a bold new chapter—and you get to write it your way.
Warmly,
Elaine
Elaine Belansky, PhD, is a retirement transition coach who helps women in their 50s and 60s design a bold, fulfilling next chapter. After a 30-year career in public health and education, Elaine now supports women who are navigating the emotional, social, and identity shifts that come with retirement. Her coaching blends science-backed tools, real-life experience, and deep empathy to help clients create lives rich in connection, learning, and meaning.
You can learn more at ElaineBelansky.com.
